Writers block and honesty in word

Yesterday, I ran a 10k.  It was not my best time, about an hour.  I felt good the whole run.  Monday, I ran my third five mile run, in my cycle.  Time to do my six mile, I did it plus a little extra.  My training routine is three five mile runs and then the fourth is long.  The next one will be seven miles.  If you notice, you can see my writers block and my runners block working together in this blog,  I run when I wrestle my mood and my mind into my body, and get it moving.  This may not happen in a routine cycle.  In fact, it does not.  I write, when I have something to write about.  I stop writing when I don't want to talk about it.  About what is blocking me.  Inevitably it is me.  Usually, I know what I am doing and do it on purpose.  I just choose not to share it with you the reader. So here is the one, the one that reveals me for who I am.  An inconsistent man.  I am who I am and that is what I say to myself, when I am being stubborn.

I took a week off, to rest my muscles and enjoy some alcohol.  It turns out this was a good idea.  I feel better.  I know that I said "No Alcohol." I drank three times in January.  A major reduction in my normal consumption.  The week that I took off, I drank five out of the seven days.  It is very clear to me, the residual effect that alcohol has on my motivation to run.  It is not just physical, which it is, but it is mental.  Alcohol is a depressant.  So grappling with this toxin, is not what my body needs, in order to prepare itself to run 26 miles.  I will keep working to keep my intake low.  I know that I must, if I am to finish.  The big question is, do I quit smoking marijuana?  (the big reveal) I am a legal participant in Washington State.  I have fused vertebrae in my C4/C5, and life long discomfort.  I smoke it everyday.  I have during the entire time that I have been working on my marathon and this blog.  I wonder if this is why I have not finished lol.  I am now working this algorhithm into my training routine.  No alcohol, generally.  Marijuana has to be reduced or eliminated all together, but I am reluctant to say silly things about what that schedule will be.  I smoked and drank yesterday.  I ran a 10k.  I felt great.  I have been up this hill before.  Somewhere around seventeen miles, I crap out.  So this time, I will be focused on my body and what it needs.  Rather than tell you what I "will do" and then tell you how I didn't do those things, this blog will be a report of what I did do.  Come on this run with me.

This is the Plan

The five mile club, round two...not so easy as the first one. HaHa...the excitement of a new achievement is pure adrenaline, low dose and constant.  Today was the reality, I have decided that five miles is the minimum training run from here on out.  Everything since the new year has been conditioning to train, now it is time to train, actual.  This distance is a strong run, I plan to repeat it three times and then up it one mile on the fourth.  I will repeat this cycle, all the way up the hill.  In my mind it is like slow boiling a frog, one day I will wake up and be at the top.  In my mind.  In reality there are many miles to go.  The last go of it I had, in between the time I completed the Walla Walla Half Marathon (and fell out of the full), and my PBR of seventeen miles in March of 2011, I pushed way to hard...I was trying to train regularly above 10 miles per run, and I think my muscles were just, pretty much, like "fuck you, asshole," after my 17 miler.  Also, it was pretty epic, because I ran from my house, in a complete circle around my home community of Walla Walla, WA...all of it, including the bedroom community next door, home to my alma mater, College Place, WA.  I fell, had blood all down my leg, met jesus on the road, died twenty times inside, was sunned on, rained on, winded on...I was like a victorious battled, veteran of the war...which I am.  So I said, "fuck  it, I am drinking beer for a while." This time?  I will only reward myself with bloody mary's and beer, after I finish this one little thing...actually, twenty six of them. Ha.

Back on the Trail

The marathon effort is underway again.  2010, I left the writing for another day.  By summers end, I was close to ready...for a half marathon, instead, I registered for the full in the Walla Walla Marathon, 10/10/10.  I ran fourteen, walked two, had too drop due to the road cramps...twice, and then caught a ride back.  I realized that the goal is not to kill myself, the marathon will always be there, and fourteen running miles was a PBR.  My younger Marine Corps self could never have achieved that.  2011, I kept training. I increased my PBR to seventeen miles in March of last year.  After feeling road worn and abused, by my own mentality, I quit training for the year.  Keep in mind, that during all this period of training, I never gave up my late nights or my beer...so not really surprised that I could not go over the hump, are we?

2012 brings with a renewed vigor and a sharpened sense of purpose.  Yesterday, I rejoined the five miles plus club again.  Feels good, even though I am packing an extra twenty pounds over my previous fit weight...this shall go. No alcohol, limiting meal portions, getting regular sleep...running with toe bounce and easy stride...back up the hill I go! This blog light is back on,  so you can follow my steps to my final tape, 26.2 miles later.